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îò Ìèëëû 26.10.07 hey everyone! just thought you might enjoy seeing the progression of my physical downfall! LOL! these three pics encompass the over 50 pounds i had to gain to achieve my present unbelievably svelte figure of 191! i think i did a great job getting here and the journey has been a gastronomical pleasure! i also added a pic of me in the nursery! of course now that i've set everything up, i won't let my daughter touch anything! its way too cute just the way it is! just kidding! kind of. but seriously, babies want to play with the box that toys came in more than the toys themselves! thank god. not cause i want to play with them myself or anything! what do you think, that i would buy my daughter toys and then not let her touch them?! how could you say such a thing?! i'll let her play with them! when she's like 18! LOL! 2 part: hey everyone! so just went to the doctor today and he said that it could be any day now! my due date is nov 4th, but i think my daughter has other ideas! lol! up until 2 weeks ago she had been a breach baby since about aug. which is pretty rare as babies move around so much normally, doing somersaults until they get too big to change positions so drastically. well, she decided that she really liked her spatial location and literally stayed that way for over 2 months! lol! i can see that she is already a very determined little thing! and she knows what she wants! so to avoid a caesarian, i had to go to the hospital and have a "cephalic version" done, which is a fancy way of saying that the doctors manually turned her thru the external manipulation of my belly. to say the least, it was one of the less pleasant things a person needs to go thru. but thank goodness, the version was a great success and she has gotten accustomed to her new position beautifully. and she's moving around like a champion, which is always a great sign that the baby is doing well. actually, so well that since the procedure, my pregnancy has progressed so quickly that my doctor advised me to stop my daily exercise routine and just take it easy for the rest of the time, or she could come tomorrow if i'm not careful! which wouldn't be so bad, as the last thing i need is her gaining weight in my belly! lol! she's already a strapping 7.4 pounds! completely full term, totally healthy and ready to be born at any time. the only problem is that paul is finishing his new film as we speak in montreal and won't wrap until like the day before her actual due date! so, i am trying my hardest to stretch the time out until at least this weekend, so he can finish with his principals and wrap them, allocate stuff to the other people and get his skinny butt down here (my poor man has been working so hard to finish his film on time so he can be here for her birth that he has lost about as much weight as i've gained! but he's still the most gorgeous man in the world!) to meet who will be the most important person in his life. apart from me. but that goes without saying. lol! on another note, i want to thank you all again for the incredible influx of sweet thoughts and wishes that you have all sent me! its so incredible to have such amazing, smart, funny people writing their thoughts on both MillaJ.com and Millanews.com! i am very, very lucky to have you all sending me such good feelings! i have noticed that my weight has been a hilarious subject with many people recently and my cravings as well! lol! you will all be glad to know that i have evened out at an astronomically well proportioned 191 and feel very confident that if i continue having minimal amounts of tiramisu (about 3 servings every second day) and cutting my sprite intake (to about 4 cans every 3 hours) i should be totally fit and ready to have this baby! lol! JUST KIDDING PEOPLE! (i'm sure someone will print this quote without the "just kidding" part of course! but how would people sell their magazines without the selective honesty of the press! well, honesty is SO overrated anyway! i mean, give me a juicy gossip column any day! puhleaze! lol!) i'm totally serious about the balancing out at 191 thing though. my doctor is very proud of me and to tell you the truth, i'm proud too! itaˆ™s just that food tastes so darn good when you don't deaden your taste buds with tobacco! i feel like i discovered some ancient secret of life and happiness or something! but it's all good, as soon as i am back to my normal super hero standard, i'm gonna go to kfc and get a box of 10 biscuits, stop at my local market where they make the most unbelievable fried chicken (cause kfc chicken is just bad karma), grab half a chicken and eat it all!!!! this is seriously what i fantasize about these days! lol! but it works! as long as i know that at some point i can do that, i stay on my boneless, skinless, grilled chicken and veggies torture regimen. well, enough about food! i've been home longer in the last few weeks than i've been since i was probably 14 and grounded by my dad! itaˆ™s so amazing having the opportunity to actually putter around the house and do things that you never normally get the time to do! i've been moving furniture and arranging flowers thru out the house, my big "project" lately has been organizing my library! that is so cool, cause i have so many books and they were all scattered on shelves helter skelter and needless to say, finding something was an effort of epic proportions. now, showing incredible perseverance that is kind of creepy and undeniably ocd, i have categorized said books in specific sections. art, architecture, photography, fashion, fiction, history, philosophy, biography, reference, graphic art and childrens. its turned into a veritable barnes and nobles. talk about "nesting"! i also have a collection of old, rare books which i have finally been able to display properly which are so beautiful! i have an edition of "alice in wonderland" and "thru the looking glass" from 1872, i also have a second edition of Charles Dickens "sketches by Boz" which is something he wrote at the very beginning of his career in serial format (well, i guess all his books were written in serial format) when he was still writing under the pseudonym "Boz" with illustrations by the great Goerge Cruikshank! its such a wonderful series of essays on everyday life and people of that period (the mid 1800's). its such a find! i also collect illustrated fairy tales and managed to find some really gorgeous editions, with illustrations by some of my favorite graphic artists. Arthur Rackam, Edmund Dulac, Kay Neilson, Charles Robinson, Jessie Wilcox Smith and the incomparable Harry Clarke! i am so excited that at some point i will be able to share these treasures with my daughter! she will grow up with such magical images to influence her imagination! anyway, now its just about getting the nursery in order, but thats sort of been the least worrying thing on my mind to get finished because she will be with paul and i in our room for a while still to come, so there is plenty of time to get her room ready. besides the fact that come feb. or march i will be back on airplanes with her in tow and staying in hotels while i'm working on my next film ("Winter Queen" as well as something else that is in the works right now that i will tell you guys about as soon as it solidifies). well, thanks again for all your support, kindness and humor! it is so appreciated! i guess the next time you hear from me, i will be a mama! i will try and drop you all a line after she is born to give you the details and tell you her name. i want you all to be the first to hear it. all the best! -m 15.09.07 hey everyone! gosh this has been a pretty hectic month! been to nyc twice for j-h work, now i have so much press to do for re3, i'll be working all weekend doing domestic tv tomorrow and international on sunday, then off to vegas for the premiere. i'll be racing to the airport the next day for germany to play a cameo in wim wenders new film (The Palermo Shooting), then some work in paris before coming home for the last month of my pregnancy! let me tell you, i can't wait till the end of this month! to just be able to stay home for a month and prepare for my little baby's arrival without anything else to do apart from drawing for the fall collection will be so nice! i am so huge you guys! i've gained almost 70 pounds in the last 4 months! It's unbelievable how quickly it all happened, all i did was eat three bagels every morning with butter, peanut butter and jelly all over them, a few boxes of crispy cream donuts for lunch and boom! i'm tipping the scale at 195! man, that came out of nowhere! lol! well maybe not completely out of nowhere! so now i'm completely going in the opposite extreme and eating nothing but chicken, fish and veggies with the closest thing to bread taking the form of oatmeal in the morning with just the teensiest bit of maple sugar to make it bearable... sigh! all i want is another box of donuts! well, only 8 more weeks to go and then hopefully i'll start to get back to normal. i put together a few more demos from the last few years that no one has heard yet that i thought would be fun to share with you guys. the song "lazy orbit" was recorded in a rehearsal studio with some old friends of mine while the rest i recorded on my computer by plugging my guitar in and sampling drum sounds. i think they are cool ideas and would love to take them to the next level at some point, but it seems that i just haven't had time to be serious about my music in recent years. i think i will always make music though, but i don't know if i would want to do it professionally in the future, enough of my life is based on business, so it's wonderful to have something that is totally personal and does not have any monetary value to me! i want to thank everyone for their wonderful pregnancy wishes for me! i had some time to sit down and read some of your threads and i have to say, i was so touched emotionally at times that i felt like crying, while at other times i was on the floor trying not to pee from laughter! you guys bring up some hilarious stuff sometimes! anyway, thank you all again for thinking of me and stopping in your day to let me know your thoughts. they are so so appreciated. all the best to you! and enjoy the new music! -milla 23.06.07 hey everybody! what an unbelievably exciting time for me right now... i would have to say THE most exciting time in my life so far! i am pregnant with my first child and i just feel so so blessed. this has been quite a tumultuous period in my life, because i have been trying so desperately to take some time off from traveling and have some time to nest in my new home with my fiance, but previous contractual obligations have made that kind of difficult! i finally get to stay home this month and then next month press for re3 starts, so its off to europe and japan with my big belly and aching back! i wanted to write you guys a letter a few weeks ago, but after taking 6 flights in 5 days, i got back to los angeles sick as a dog, with the worst cough and stuffed up nose which usually doesn't deter me from going about my life and work, seeing as that i normally stuff my face with as much medication as is physically safe for me to take! only being pregnant, you're not allowed any of these miraculous substances (and believe me, when you can't take them, they seem like one of god's small miracles!), so i had to fight it all by myself and it was just awful! thank god for paul and his amazing cups of ginger tea with honey! i can feel her moving. that feeling is like nothing else in this world, i truly understand now how motherhood changes women. to imagine that little body forming, to see her in my mind nestled inside me, floating in her own little self contained eco sphere makes me feel so special. like i know some incredible secret about life that always eluded me in the past. my little tiny baby just right there, no matter what i do or where i go, she is always right there and now i can feel her. it's funny cause when i couldn't feel her, it almost didn't feel totally real. i could see that i was changing in the mirror, but i wasn't sure how i was changing in my mind, but now everyday she just gets stronger and stronger, her movements are so present -like something turning in my belly doing somersaults or something- that i can't help but start dreaming about our future together and all the things i want to show her. i want to be there for her whenever she needs me, i want to take her all over the world and show her all the amazing places through my eyes, especially mongolia, peru, nepal. places that will give her a totally different view of reality. i want her to be in yoga and martial arts classes from like birth! i don't ever want her to know what being stiff feels like! i want to take her up into the mountains in the snow, i want her to climb pyramids and love this earth, so she can help the next generation preserve it. i want to take her to see the african national parks, show her how special this world is. how special she is to be alive in this world. i feel that once i see her, my own reality will come to a grinding halt and everything will just fall into perspective... i started doing pre-natal yoga and that has been really great, besides sharing funny stories with other moms, its really given me a chance to spend some quality time each day focusing on my growing body and my daughter. its weird but when you get really busy sometimes, days go by and you realize that you haven't really spent much time just focusing on what's going on with you. so i needed to just create time for myself to just stop everything. besides the fact that my lower back is killing me and it feels so good to stretch and get my blood flowing through all the sore bits! i highly recommend it for any mommies or mommies to be who might be reading this! my mom is obsessed! she feels like because my daughter will be born a scorpio, that they are soul mates and she will be my mom's ally! lol! she's convinced that her grand daughter will be exactly like her! it's so hilarious because of course she's implying that i am not! thank goodness! she already wrote the baby a letter telling her what an incredible connection they have and how alike they are, a little wishful thinking, huh? it's too cute. i told her i was kind of jealous, i mean she never wrote ME such a sweet and thoughtful letter! lol! i feel if i'm not careful i might not see my child till she's in college, unless its in a movie or magazine of course cause grandma is sure that my daughter will be a movie star! lol! she's a good soul my mom and she means well, as long as my daughter is happy, grandma is welcome to enroll her into acting class! lol! but, there will be no forcing of any career on my child if she doesn't want it. i woke up really early this morning and had my cup of tea out in the back garden. we live nestled into a mountain and if you're careful and quiet, you can see wildlife everywhere! we get this amazing family of deer coming through everyday and i wanted to get up early to catch a glimpse of them. i went out, but they weren't around at first, so went to the kitchen, made tea and got a bowl of cereal before i went back out and there they were! a mama deer and her baby, eating our plants and fruit trees! they were a bit startled at first and baby ran up into the hillside to hide, but his mom stood her ground as we both froze and stared at one another. this lasted quite some time before she relaxed, saw that i wasn't coming any closer and finally just continued to eat! it was so incredible to feel that she trusted me and wasn't going to run! after a while, baby came down as well and they wandered around, grazing on the different flowers and bushes. it was the most magical feeling and all i could think of was how great it was going to be to do this with my daughter at some point soon! thank you guys again for all your continued support and interest in all my endeavors! i am truly so blessed in having all of you around thinking of me from time to time and sending me good feelings and prayers once in a while! i can't wait to show my little baby girl this website and all the interesting people on it and when she learns how to type, she'll be sending you her own messages! i send you all so much happiness and health in all that you do! all the best to you! -milla 17.12.06 hey everyone! first of all, i want to thank you all so much for your sweet birthday wishes! you don't know how much it means to me to have your thoughts expressed to me like that, to know that you all took the time to write me... you're incredible! i can't believe how lucky i am to have so much good will in my life! it truly makes me feel so blessed and i can't thank you enough! i wish all of you the most amazing holidays and a joyous, healthy and unbelievable new year! if i could take a moment more of your time, i would really appreciate it, because i wanted to tell you about something that i think is really important for all of us to try to protect and cherish as much as we possibly can. the african national parks. i really want to help preserve the african national parks; especially in the war torn republic of congo, also kenya and zambia. these parks are teaming hotspots of some of the world's widest bio-diversity, that are incredibly underfunded. the infrastructures of these parks get ripped apart by war, lack of education, general disrepair and worst of all, because there is now no law against it: poaching, because guards and employees are working for years without pay. i have made donations to them myself already. and was wondering if you could too. just go to: http://whc.unesco.org/en/congobiodiversity this site provides information and links to organizations who support these particular parks: 1. virunga national park you can also do a google search to find out more about each of these parks. i would love for people to know more about these incredible places, because they are all of ours, and we have to help do our best to make sure these last vestiges of endangered animal life are preserved for future generations. thank you all so much! all the best and happy holidays! -milla 08.03.04 Êðàòêèé ïåðåâîä* Ïîëíûé ïåðåâîä Hey everyone, just thought I’d let you in on some stuff… I’m starting a film called “.45” in about a month and it’s the first of three independent projects slated for this year for me. I love working on smaller films, because people take bigger risks with the script material and characters, so it’s really easy to get immersed in a totally different world from the one you’re actually living in. I wanted to share this process to some extent with you guys, because I said I would write from the set of my films to update you, but in so many strange ways, the film begins before the film in many ways. The character is starting way before I ever get on set really, so the lines between filming and life do get a bit blurred on certain movies… well, I guess the ones where the main concern of the producers and directors isn’t the monster or the explosions! Yea. That helps as you can well imagine… so I’ve been doing a lot of writing and thought that maybe I’d share it with you, I’ve transposed it to make it more “reader friendly” of course, but it’s close enough to some sort of process that I go through in the midst of preparing for a certain part. So here you go… “.45 is starting…” It’s funny how the leaving behind of me begins; like some ebbing of the tide, slowly but inevitably it is pulled farther and farther away… till all that’s being left in the end… is Pat. It’s not that I’m becoming Pat per se, but this inexorable leaving behind of Milla takes place. It gets easier to leave Milla’s habits, concerns, problems, existential crisis’ (oh yea, baby) etc… sitting peaceably on that proverbial “shore”, as it may. Let them rest (damn it!). Get some air, for God’s sake. I don’t know, it’s such a strange gorgeous process, it’s a bit hard to describe otherwise. I don’t become someone else, because I feel that we all have every personality inside us already, the whole range, the… very scope of human emotion, color, experience… we carry that, like some brightly glowing, constantly spinning sphere, a radiant jewel reflecting the light of our personal, daily experience, whatever that may be; out of our bodies, out of our reactions, hesitations, out of our feelings even! Yes, even my feelings change. Other things tend to come into focus, more often than not. The usual ones go out more… I’m not reacting like myself to things and what I am reacting to is different as well. I lose a bit of vision for my everyday life and things start to disappear somehow (think “Dogville”, where people just walk into invisible doors)… I find that (I guess because I have the luxury to go a bit mad and really lose myself… I really start to believe. It’s actually my job to!! Hehe.) I could be walking into any environment and suddenly it’s not just me walking anymore, it’s Pat… it’s Pat dealing with a world that’s, obviously, very different from her own; but still it’s her determination, her fears, her insecurities, her existential crisis’ (huh. I said that in jest kind of, but what are her existential crisis’ about?! Hehe. Anyway.) It’s her world that I carry with me through my days here. Every morning I wake up feeling –deeper- swept into this magical world, where I don’t need to think about myself, don’t need to feel too much about my own life. Let me give you the secret to making magic: be ready to put your life down for every choice you make. Hehe. Yea, you see. Did your palms get a little sweaty when I suggested that? Hehe. That’s magic. It’s scary, but very effective. To have that kind of freedom at your fingertips. Wow. It’s something we can only strive to attain as much as we are aware of it… but just the… smell of it is intoxicating. It’s magnetic, that kind of independence, that fluidity in navigating through life… Because suddenly, everything that happens to me becomes Pat’s experience, more so than mine at times! It’s her… fierceness, staring out of my eyes these days. I know it. I can feel it in my bones. Because I have to admit, the Milla of late is one who… well, does not possess the fearlessness that Pat has (“…She reads too much to start with for fuck’s sake, filling her head up with so much use less bullshit… “ Says Pat with a knowing laugh. “…Who wastes their time reading anything longer than an article in Cosmo when there is a world out there to be conquered… by it’s rightful queen. Ha! Yea, that’s right, you got something to say?) Milla is completely spoiled. A soft, bourgeois bitch. She would never be able to deal with half the crap Pat puts up with on a daily basis. At least not lately… Milla has been –in the last few years- someone who is so internally driven, and on the other hand funnily enough, so caught up in running from herself and her personal monsters and creating a world in which to run to… without feeling like she’s “wasting time” of course. Duh. But, in the world of “Creature Ent”, my production company and all the creativity it is home to, it’s really easy to. Especially if you’re not lazy. There is always something happening, always something to dive into… From Chris and I getting the rights to one of my favorite books called “Falling” which my friend Thomas Care just finished writing a phenomenal script for, and, which I just had the most beautiful set of notes sent to me for, by one of my favorite script writers (and novelists) of all time Alexander Stuart –“The War Zone”-. Carmen and I have been in our dream world of the fall/winter collection, researching, drawing… making, making, making! We’re opening the “Jovovich-Hawk” boutique in NY in Sept. ’05… I can even put musical ideas on the site and not feel like my music is completely unshared, though I wish I had time to go back in the studio at some point soon… It’s just too much of this self-contained universe, in many ways, it’s too damn safe! (And God! So easy to really let yourself get -way too- caught up in your own bull. It’s true. I feel when our internal world becomes too great, it’s maniacal. It could get sociopathic, and has before, many times through history. It’s the psychology of murderers and dictators... and artists; especially artists who never got their break. Watch “Cold Case Files” and you’ll see. They totally believe their own publicity for lack of better words. Their actions and lifestyles reflect such unrealistic associations between themselves and the rest of the world around them! Look at Hitler for one, the Black Dalia Avenger, Man Ray, Marquis De Sade... Anyway, sorry about the going off on tangents! I just really resent when people feel they have this pre-ordained superiority over others, it really makes me scared… and angry. Think what you want, you abominations, but never act upon those evil thoughts. Those selfish, irrational, “surrealist” thoughts. Surrealist my butt.) So anyway! To make a long story short -which of course is too late- Milla has been cradled in the bosom of sowing and reaping the fruit of her labors, her many years work and now it’s time to step off for a while and forget the scared, tiny, inconsequential person she had become. What a relief! Now we can start playing! I’ve been rehearsing with Angus Mcfadyen –who plays my boyfriend, Ed, in the movie- for the last few weeks and it’s been just, out of this world… this new world that we’re creating. It’s so present, our first read-throughs are just happening like nothing, all these different feelings, different depths of emotion, the energy is cracking to the point where we’re like “… whoa! Maybe we should just leave this alone till like the week before shooting, till we get into costume and get into the apartment where Pat and Ed have most of their scenes…” I swear, with some people you can rehearse until the cows come home and there is nothing… no spark, no (taps her nose confidentially) smell of… “yea, this is the truth, this is the real thing”. It’s so wonderful to go there like that, because the time just flies like nothing and you’ve just spent the whole day without thinking about yourself once or if you do, it’s with this funny detachment, like as if from so far away… it’s so amazing to just… go somewhere else. Yea. It’s so good to feel like this again… the last time I felt this way was also on other independent films I’ve done… I mean obviously RE1 and 2, were not meant to be thought of to such detail and depth! Hehe! But I need to do them, on the other hand, as a balance… to train as well. To learn from such incredible athletes, find that physical discipline and control that is so necessary to feel good about yourself… feel like you did your best… I wanted to quickly update the booklist… “The House of Mirth” by Edith Warton is so simple and startlingly honest. A real picture into the life of… well, a pretty mediocre girl if you ask me. But so beautiful all the same, I mean she is you and I, she is every person who ever had the honesty to admit to themselves that “…no, maybe I didn’t do all I could have with the talents god gave me…” She’s lovely and pathetic and charming… she’s noble, but not enough; cold hearted and scheming, but sadly in some way, too, not enough so. She’s the quintessential “neither here nor there” and I found A LOT to relate in there. I’m being horribly honest, but when the hell are things ever so black and white I ask you? Are we super heroes every minute of the day, or, in the same breath, are we losers, wretched, pitiable things always, in every action? No. I defy anyone to argue with me on that particular issue. Anyway, some guys would maybe call it a “chick book”, but I don’t know, I found it a very telling picture of that type of “upper class” society (if you could call them that!) in that period -at the turn of the century- in America. “Vanity Fair” by Thackerey, I read, honestly cause of the movie that came out recently, which I have yet to see because I wanted to read the book before I watched it, you know? So anyway, it’s funny to read after “house of mirth” cause where the latter is written with utmost simplicity and a matter of fact honesty, the former is Dickensian in it’s “…oh, capital, capital! By Jove! Bladda, bladda, bladda…” I mean, It is written with a sense of humour, but I was absolutely bowled over by thackerey’s pretty one-dimensional, misogonystic takes on women! You have on one side of the spectrum Becky, the ill used orphan, not to be trusted because, get this! She has been so badly treated that she is nothing better than a little serpent after all that life long, cruel persecution! Life has been hard to her, which in turn has hardened her and the very fact that she always manages to stay afloat seems in some way offensive to Mr. Thackerey! Better for her to shut herself up in a convent to pay herself back for the horrible life she has led till then! Cold. Hehe. Then you have Amelia, the sweet, selfless, “picture of female perfection” because she chooses to be a doormat for the man who abuses her, but that she loves with “ a holy passion” and is loyal to mentally as well as physically until over a decade after his death… Oops! Shouldn’t have said that, but I doubt any of you are really gonna take the time to read this friggin book unless you’re as obsessively thorough as I am, to my own detriment! She loves him with complete selflessness until she too is called ungrateful for it! After everything he puts her through, she also has to be humiliated before Dobbin before she realizes that she really loves him! Look, I get it, you can’t love a ghost your whole life, but what’s wrong with good old-fashioned mourning anyway? And let’s be perfectly frank, I mean it does take Dobbin long enough to finally get the balls to admit to her how serious he is about her, I mean as more than a friend! Whatever, Thackerey definitely didn’t leave these girls many options to feel with one way or the other… but, I guess that’s also the beauty of classic literature, one gets to see life from such astoundingly different perspectives… I did find something to relate to about it; that whole-hearted, futile passion Amelia shares for the picture on her wall… it is selfish. And self-indulgent. And these are qualities I want to cut away from myself, in horror, as if they are festering sores, blooming on my once clean skin. “Pale Fire” by Vladimir Nabakov. A few things I feel about Nabakov before I tell you about the book. Firstly, he’s never been my favorite Russian writer, mostly because of a certain disattachment (I know that’s not a word, but I like it), I felt from him about his own writing… I don’t know, he felt cold to the touch, you know? I wasn’t left with the exhausted rage of a Dostoyevsky, the pathetic, bewildered irony of Kafka or even the emotionally spontaneous, magical realism of Bulgokov. With Nabakov, I was just sort of left feeling like I slept with a dead fish all night kind of… hehe. But then a friend suggested I read “Pale Fire” and something kind of clicked in my head about our dear Vlad. It’s touching really, because this story to me, is so telling of the author himself, more so than so many books can say of their particular creators. It has so much depth, layer upon layer of complexity as we sail through all these different aspects of one human being… one terribly human being. And, let me tell you, it’s a lovely journey, full of difficulties and strewn with obstacles, but then in the midst of all these tempests or on the other hand, days of sailing with no end in sight… you happen upon these veritable oasis of literary articulation, nay, exemplification. Sweet, precious jewels disguised as sentences, caging ideas of the most lofty and innocent beauty. Tiny epiphanies explode into supernova of realization and you can only read and re-read that one certain line, till all you can do is weep from the sheer clarity of the almost metaphysical images he has uncovered your eyes and heart to. “Pale Fire” is in itself a timeless poem, written by a fictional author. The book starts with this 100 line masterpiece. Then as if that were not enough, the poem is then, literally, translated to us by a petty, little professor; a selfish, meaningless tyrant, who has a strange obsession with the author of the poem himself. He has been there with the author for the duration of the poem’s composition and has tried in many ways to “inspire” the author with tales of his –the proffesor’s- homeland. When he finally reads the poem, he is hilariously enraged to find that the author has done nothing of the kind and allows us to see his anger and annoyance, sharing with us the story he feels SHOULD have been the poem. Anyway, seeing the book from the perspective of: all these different people are still Nabakov himself, is very interesting, because in some way it made me understand him as a whole person, the noble and the petty. And no, he is not a “page turner” but, in some way, I feel like good things come to those who wait and he makes you work for those precious jewels… Then, the next logical thought is: He was writing these books IN ENGLISH, not even his first language and you realize why he ends up being so… analytical? I guess. Detached, surgical almost. But so aware of that part of himself that’s… well, lacking I guess. Whoa, this is getting rather verbose. And I still have a few more books I wanted to talk about… well let me give you one more and then I’ll let you go! “The Fairytales of Herman Hesse”. I’m an avid collector of fairytales from all over, but mainly from classic authors. I have Oscar Wilde’s already, they are really special, Nathaniel Hawthorne’s children’s stories and such. Well, I was really pleased to add Hesse’s to my collection. They are incredibly poignant and sad most of the time, well not sad really, I guess not to a child, cause most of them have happy endings, but if you look at them from a psychological perspective, from an archetypal perspective, you realize the simple truths that are related therein. The cycles that people repeat… no they are really lovely. I highly recommend them, but for adults too! Even more than for the kids really! In the same way that I feel we have to re-read “Alice in Wonderland” every few years, it’s NOT A CHILDREN’S STORY, but a psychological navigation manual! Hehe. Well, on that note, I’ll take my leave of you. Thanks for reading till the end, those who are reading these words now and I’ll write again when I can’t take it anymore and the words come tumbling unto the sweet plateau of your understanding… uuummm. Ok, I’ll stop now. Bye. -milla
*- ïåðâîé ÷àñòè ñâîåãî ïîñëàíèÿ Ìèëëà ðàññêàçûâàåò î òîì ÷òî åé ñêîðî ïðåäñòîÿò ñüåìêè â íîâîì ôèëüìå ïîä íàçâàíèåì ".45" .È ðàññóæäàåò î ñîìíåíèÿõ êîòîðûå ïðîèñõîäÿò â åå äóøå.Îíà òàêæå äåëèòñÿ ñâîèì ìíåíèåì íà îêðóæàþùèå åå âåùè.È äàæå âðåìåíàìè ðóãàåò ñåáÿ (....Milla is completely spoiled. A soft, bourgeois bitch....). Âî âòîðîé ÷àñòè ïîñëàíèÿ îíà ðàññêàçûâåò î ñâîèõ ïëàíàõ íà áóäóùåå,â ÷àñòíîñòè îíà ïîâåäàëà ÷òî â ñåíòÿáðå 2005 ãîäà îíà è Êàðìåí îòêðîþò áóòèê “Jovovich-Hawk” â Íüþ-Éîðêå. Òðåòüþ ÷àñòü îíà íàçâàëà ïðîñòî- I wanted to quickly update the booklist…  êîòîðîé ðàññêàçûâàåò î êíèãàõ è àâòîðàõ êîòîðûå åé èíòåðåñíû â äàííûé ïåðèîä:Ýòî è Ýäèò Óîðòîí è Âëàäèìèð Íàáîêîâ,êîòîðîãî îíà ðàíüøå íå î÷åíü ëþáèëà (êñòàòè â åãî ôàìèëèè îíà ñäåëàëà îïå÷àòêó-ïðèì.àâòîðà) è äàæå ñêàçêè Ãåðìàíà Ãåññå.Êñòàòè Ìèëëà ïðèçíàëàñü ÷òî îáîæàåò ñêàçêè è ÷òî ó íåå óæå äîâîëüíî îáøèðíàÿ êîëåêöèÿ.
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